when costume run crew goes terribly, terribly wrong.

once upon a time, baylor theatre did a production of schoolhouse rock live! it was an enjoyable experience for all involved, cast and crew alike. except for one fateful night...

the shrl! costume run crew consisted of me, zach krohn, emmie rothenbach and taylor kulhanek...basically a group of badasses. we managed to cover the responsibilities of both run crew and maintenance, going above and beyond our call of duty. after a stellar performance one night, zach, taylor and i had gathered the laundry and taken it up to the costume shop to wash. we started a load of multicolored splatter-painted tshirts and then headed downstairs to retrieve a laundry basket full of vests. it was late and we were tired, so we thought we'd take the elevator...we deserved it.

so we climb aboard. the doors slide closed. i press the "1" button. we wait. and wait. and wait. and nothing happens. i push the "1" button again. and wait....and wait...and wait. nothing happens. zach has the wonderful idea to push the "1" and "2" buttons at the same time. taylor and i agree that this is obviously the best way to get the elevator moving. but alas, nothing happens. we sadly resign ourselves to taking the stairs and push the button to open the doors, but to our surprise...they don't open.

i wish i could say we stayed calm, assessed the situation and dealt with it like mature adults. but then i would be lying. instead, zach starts laughing, i startshitting the doors, and taylor has a minor panic attack. "guys," she says. "i'm claustrophobic." zach and i say "REALLY?" and she says, "no, i was just trying to be funny...but it is hot in here. i think i'm getting a rash. does that look like a rash to you?"

fast forward fifteen minutes. we finally have the bright idea to push the big red button that says EMERGENCY on it and have a nice chat with a member of the baylor dps, who obviously had nothing better to do with this friday night but wait for elevator distress calls. and i thought my life was boring. he deduces that we are caught between floors, assures us that help is on the way and tells us to stay put (WHERE WOULD WE GO?). we calm down a bit and settle in to wait for our rescue.

fast forward forty five minutes. all three of us are slumped on the floor of the elevator. we have sung through the entire score of schoolhouse rock live! at the top of our lungs and are currently in the middle of composing a rap song about being trapped in an elevator. r. kelly has nothing on us. hunger, fatigue, and the need to use the bathroom have all began taking their toll, and we're going a bit stir crazy. just when i thought all hope was lost, we hear the dulcet tones of the one and only lisa denman from beyond the elevator doors. "HELP US LISA!" we cry. "don't worry! i'm here to save you! and by that i mean we have a maintenance guy opening the elevator for you!" inside the elevator there was much rejoicing. when those doors finally slid open, we were greeted by not just the maintenance man and lisa, but the entire cast and stage managers of shrl!, who informed us that they had been listening to us sing for at least fifteen minutes. talk about adding insult to injury.

and this is why i refused to use the elevator for the rest of the year.